Losing a finger
A gorgeous blond went to the doctor's office with the end of her finger missing.When asked what had happened she answered that she had shot it off while trying to kill herself.
"How could that happen? Shooting yourself in the hand would not kill you!", said the doctor.
"Well, you see," she responded... "First I was going to shoot myself in the heart but when I put the gun between my breasts I thought I could not ruin $20,000 worth of surgery."
"So, I put the gun in my mouth. But I didn't want to mess up $10,000 worth of teeth."
"Finally I put the gun in my ear. And because I knew it was going to make a very loud noise... I put this finger in the other ear!"
指をなくす
とてもきれいな金髪女性が指の先が無くなってしまって医者に行きます。医者がどうしてこうなったかと聞くと、彼女は自殺しようとして指を撃ち抜いてしまったと答えます。
「どうやったらそうなるんですか？手を撃ったって自殺なんかできませんよ！」と医者が言います。
「ですから、その、」と彼女は言います．．．「最初は心臓を撃とうと思って胸に銃を当てたんだけど、2万ドルもした豊胸手術が台無しになるからやめたの。」
「それで、次に銃を口に入れたのよ。でも今度は1万ドルも掛けた歯の矯正がぐちゃぐちゃになっちゃうでしょ。」
「結局それで銃を耳に当てたのよ。で、撃つとすごく大きな音がするのが分かってたから．．．この指で反対側の耳を塞いだの！」
