Reason to Be Nice
A big shot business man had to spend a couple of days in the hospital.He was a royal pain to the nurses because he bossed them around just like he did his employees. None of the hospital staff wanted to have anything to do with him. The head nurse was the only one who could stand up to him.She came into his room and announced, "I have to take your temperature." After complaining for several minutes, he finally settled down, crossed his arms and opened his mouth. "No, I'm sorry, the nurse stated, "but for this reading, I cannot use an oral thermometer." This started another round of complaining, but eventually he rolled over and bared his rear end. After feeling the nurse insert the thermometer, he heard her announce,"I have to get something. Now you stay JUST LIKE THAT until I get back!"
She leaves the door to his room open on her way out. He cursed under his breath as he hears people walking past his door laughing. After almost an hour, the man's doctor comes into the room.
"What's going on here?" asked the doctor. Angrily, the man answers, "What's the matter, Doc? Haven't you ever seen someone having their temperature taken?"
After a pause, the doctor confesses, "Well, no. I guess I haven't. Not with a carnation anyway."
嫌われ者は損をする
とても偉そうなビジネスマンが数日間病院で過ごすことになった。彼は看護婦達にも自分の部下に接するような態度で居たのでみんなの嫌われ者となっていた。病院の関係者の一人も彼と関わりたくなかった。看護婦長だけは別で、彼に向かって文句を言えるのだった。彼女はビジネスマンの部屋に入ってくると宣言する、「あなたの体温を計ります。」 数分間文句を言った後、彼はついに落ち着き、腕を組むと口を開けた。婦長は言う、「悪いけど違います。この検査は口で計る検査じゃないの。」これでまたビジネスマンは文句を言い始めるが、じきにしかたなくベッドで寝転がるとずぼんをおろしお尻をさらけ出す。婦長が体温計を差し込むのを感じながら、彼は婦長がこう言うのを聞く、「ちょっと取りに行く物があるわ。あなた、私が戻るまでそのままで待っててくださいね！」
彼は部屋の側を通り過ぎる人がくすくすと笑うのを小声で罵りながら待っている。一時間近くも待たされると、医者が部屋に入ってくる。
「何が起こってるんですか？」と医者が聞く。「先生なんか問題でもあるんか？体温計で体温を計っている患者を見たことが無いとでも言うのか？」と怒って男は答える。
しばらくの間を置いて医者が白状する。「ああ、まあ、無いです。今までにカーネーションで体温を計ってる人は見たことがない。」
